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Post by HCMBrainCandy on Nov 15, 2004 14:07:52 GMT -6
This uninvited guest was very annoying...
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Post by new york pattie on Nov 15, 2004 18:00:19 GMT -6
my deepest apologies....feel free to ramble on now about your damn sweedish fish.
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Post by The Admin on Nov 15, 2004 19:18:38 GMT -6
But of course the uninvited, irrelivent guest continuted to ramble on. For some reason this caused a strange chain of events which culminated in the appearance of a potted petunia several miles above the earth. The petuina did not say much in its short existance, in fact the only thing it said was "Oh no, not again!" It is thought that if it could be said why the petunia had thought this, a great deal which is unknown about the petunia could be made known including...
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Post by newyorkpattie on Nov 20, 2004 22:00:58 GMT -6
the undeniable fact that worlin had planted it there because he is a democratic tree hugger who would give his life to save the whales. He simply loves nature, and especially enjoys putting on fluffy dresses and singing about it like in the Sound of Music. "THE HILLS ARE ALIVE, WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC"--yes, that was worlin. Also, just like in the sound of music, he will go and be a nanny for many children and end up marrying their dad instead of turning into a nun. He truly found himself happy with his husband and kids. The only reason he wanted to be a nun in the first place was because he liked the black dresses and head "clothes". All of this talk of nun attire, made Worlin decide that he did in fact want to leave his husband in search of an occupation where he could wear head "clothes." The nuns wouldn't accept him, so he went to join the muslamic terrorists just so he could wear the head cloth. (turban)
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Post by The Admin on Nov 21, 2004 19:14:27 GMT -6
But when the found out how useful he was for annoying people, the taliban decided that instead of turning him into a suicide bomber they would just mail him to the president of the united states at that time who was...
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Post by newyorkpattie on Nov 21, 2004 22:28:09 GMT -6
PRESIDENT CLINTON! Instead of annoying him, Worlin crossdressed and named himself Monika Lewinski. He engaged in several obscene acts with the president, which ultimately almost led to the impeachment of Pres. Clinton. After this tragic misfortune, Worlin returned to the taliban where he...
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Post by The Admin on Nov 23, 2004 21:00:17 GMT -6
was promptly attacked by a camel wielding a...
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Post by HCMBrainCandy on Nov 25, 2004 12:46:28 GMT -6
Gun that for some reason was called a machete. Seeing the complete stupidness of the story now, Logan's 54th editor from Genius Wars (a cannabal) was summoned, and he promptly ate the new york pattie person. That said, the world rejoiced and once more the story focused on Antidisestablishmentarianism, or Adem for short, who happened to be in quite a fix...
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Post by The Admin on Nov 25, 2004 20:19:08 GMT -6
because the sweedish fish had stolen all the toilet paper...
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Post by newyorkpattie on Nov 27, 2004 18:18:26 GMT -6
Adem was very upset due to the lack of toilet paper, so he did what any sensible person would do. He blamed Worlin. He searched for days until he found Worlin and locked him in a room with hundreds of cute little kittens until Worlin...
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Post by The Admin on Nov 28, 2004 20:38:28 GMT -6
Became a cat lover and also decided he liked green beans!
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Post by newyorkpattie on Nov 29, 2004 21:32:50 GMT -6
Worlin had become such a kind person that cared so much about other people, animals, and green beans, but eventually, he came to his senses and
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Post by The Admin on Nov 30, 2004 21:28:52 GMT -6
promptly insulted NYpattie even though she had already been eaten by Logan's 54th editor...
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Post by newyorkpattie on Dec 1, 2004 22:54:49 GMT -6
but NY Pattie was too fat to be eaten by logan's 54th editor. He knawed off some leg fat and was too stuffed to continue eating. According to logan, not his 54th editor, New York Pattie was too stupid to understand Worlin's insult so her life went on, much as it always had and very much like it always will...
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Post by The Admin on Dec 2, 2004 20:40:44 GMT -6
Except that she now had a peg leg. The peg leg was very useful because...
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Post by newyorkpattie on Dec 2, 2004 21:50:54 GMT -6
she could use it to beat Worlin unconscious and steel his...
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Post by The Admin on Dec 4, 2004 20:42:59 GMT -6
Rugged good looks, except that then the most wonderful person I have ever met decided that she wanted Fabio's mullet too!
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Post by newyorkpattie on Dec 6, 2004 16:45:16 GMT -6
However, the mullet just didn't look quite right on Worlin's beautiful head, so she disposed of it by throwing it against the slick tile wall! (Worlin's head that is)
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Post by The Admin on Dec 6, 2004 20:01:14 GMT -6
Which prompted Jeremy (who had recently gotten his 'r' back) to wonder why the wall was slick...
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Post by you smell like cabbage on Dec 6, 2004 20:12:29 GMT -6
upon further inspection he realized the wall was covered with a goopy and dripping blue goo... he thought to himself, could it be? COULD IT BE?....
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Post by The Admin on Dec 7, 2004 19:12:16 GMT -6
Smurf Blood!!!!
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Post by newyorkpattie on Dec 7, 2004 21:50:48 GMT -6
Jeremy was befuddled to find smurf blood on the tile wall. "Where the Worlin could it have come from?" he thought to himself. Then it became clear because out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a...
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Post by The Admin on Dec 8, 2004 19:13:29 GMT -6
Dead wallibe...
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Post by newyorkpattie on Dec 12, 2004 22:10:57 GMT -6
This made perfect sense because everyone knows that wallibes were Worlin's favorite animal because he used to enjoy snuggling them before new york pattie smashed his head into the slick tile wall.
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Post by The Admin on Dec 15, 2004 18:39:01 GMT -6
Having solved this mystery, Jeremy suddenly had a burst of intution greater then any he had ever felt in his life before. Instantly a million different questions raced through his mind, each seeming to answer itself. Finally, he took the descisive step and asked himself 'what is the meaning of life the universe and everything?'
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Post by newyorkpattie on Dec 15, 2004 22:48:12 GMT -6
It was only then that he realized what a stupid question it was. There is no purpose in life, no meaning for the universe, no meaning for everything. There is no meaning behind love, there is no loathing behind hate, there is no feeling behind exuberance, there is no passion within depression. The feelings and emotions you are taught your entire life are lies. The world is built on these lies. The only thing that love, hate, exuberance, and life in general can lead to is heartbreak. After realizing that the entire world is built upon lies and emotional/social connections are faulty barriers, Jewby decided to go eat a sandwich. ;D
Editor's note: (It may seem contradictory to say that there is no meaning or feeling behind everything and then refer to heartbreak, but really, there's a difference between the previously discussed feelings and heartbreak....feelings are emotions and heartbroken can be more of a physical status)
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Post by The Admin on Dec 18, 2004 20:32:32 GMT -6
Unfortunately he had no mayonaise. Somewhere, deep inside, he realized this was HWSNBN's way of punishing him for his rejection of the naive idealistic mindset that had been foisted upon mankind...
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Post by newyorkpattie on Dec 19, 2004 17:13:49 GMT -6
......i don't mean to ruin the story......but i'm stuck...i don't know what to say!
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Post by The Admin on Dec 19, 2004 20:17:07 GMT -6
The aplogy, however, was not sufficient and no mayonnaise appeared in Jeremy's refrigerador.
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Post by newyorkpattie on Dec 19, 2004 21:49:48 GMT -6
Jewby (whose "r" has been revoked until further notice) was outraged and set out to get the cofounders of this website.
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