HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on May 21, 2005 22:05:44 GMT -6
Out popped a genie, or actually much closer to the original arabic concept, a Gin... (The very bad things...)
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Post by zoel on May 23, 2005 18:28:24 GMT -6
The gin promised to grant three wishes for the editor. The first thing the editor wished for was...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on May 30, 2005 15:00:32 GMT -6
To regain his full maleness (which he had lost in a watersking accident a few years back...)
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Post by zoel on May 30, 2005 20:33:49 GMT -6
The gin promptly granted his wish, but then for good measure teleported him to a meeting of the international society of men-haters.
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on May 31, 2005 12:15:41 GMT -6
His life in jerpordy, the editor (who was still a dung beetle) wished for his second wish, namely...
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Post by zoel on May 31, 2005 21:58:22 GMT -6
for a teddy bear. He had always wanted a teddy bear ever since....
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jun 1, 2005 13:59:29 GMT -6
He had a spurt as a little kid where he thought he was a werewolf and he ripped to shreads his old teddy bear. Suddenly, a werewold bit him. The good thing was that he returned to being human. The bad news was that every night he turned into a werewolf, and so that night he ended up ripping up his new teddy bear to shreads...
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Post by zoel on Jun 1, 2005 16:18:36 GMT -6
At last, the gin asked the editor what his third wish would be...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jun 3, 2005 8:17:47 GMT -6
To bring back eight-track tapes...
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Post by zoel on Jun 3, 2005 20:26:00 GMT -6
And so the world was forced to suffer through poor music quality and frequent malfunctions but since this wish was already so bad, the gin couldn't think of any way to make it worse...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
|
Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jun 17, 2005 12:10:15 GMT -6
...And thus spontaniously combusted...
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Post by zoel on Jun 18, 2005 12:15:38 GMT -6
..the gin defeated, the editor was able to return to his work, writing this story and proceeded to relate the long and tragic history that had led Cookie Monster to eat IAMTHEMANWHOSMASHESGREENPUTTY in the first place...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
|
Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jun 18, 2005 17:55:15 GMT -6
Which he was tempted to blame, of course on nutritional facisism, as any sensible person would; however before he could write this down the evil PC thought police came in and made it clear that if he did, he would be locked in a room for a month with a potted plant... Shuddering, the editor got the message, though for good measure, as they were leaving the evil PC thought police showed him a picture of a potted plant, and as they left the last thing he saw of them was one of their hands slipping through the door holding that... picture... Instead of getting to work on explaining how the Cookie Monster ate... whatever... and of course not involving nutritional facism, he ran around his apartment looking for potted plants to be gotten rid of. He looked for a half an hour, including one grueling search inside a thimble, he was confidant that there were no potted plants in his apartment. He then realized with frightful clarity that his neighbors surely had potted plants in their apartments. Running across the hall, he broke down the door to some old woman's apartment to much screaming. Alas he had stumbled onto a tuppaware party. But more importantly, there were potted plants golore here. The editor screamed, but fear quickly gave way to dogged determination as he grabbed all the potted plants he could and began chucking them out the window, including one that unfortunetly cracked a passing pedestrian's skull. As such, the editor was arrested for breaking and entering, but also a small issue of murder was involved. As such, the editor was in a cell when he got around to working on the story once more...
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Post by zoel on Jun 21, 2005 12:22:44 GMT -6
And the first thing he wrote was about a man named "Andrew James Brown" who liked to...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jun 21, 2005 17:04:58 GMT -6
Eat potted plants. As he began to write this, the editor began to...
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Post by zoel on Jun 24, 2005 22:02:51 GMT -6
hum a little Irish tune that he had once learned while in...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jun 30, 2005 20:57:30 GMT -6
Bangledesh.
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Post by zoel on Jul 4, 2005 19:20:25 GMT -6
But of course nobody in Bangladesh was Irish, so the tune the editor thought was an Irish Jig was actually...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jul 9, 2005 13:28:32 GMT -6
A sexualy explicit Bangledeshian song.
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Post by zoel on Jul 9, 2005 21:05:09 GMT -6
...about sheep. Naturally when his next-door-neighbor (who was secretly an admirer of Bangldadesh's culture) overheard it and promptly reported the editor to...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jul 15, 2005 19:45:24 GMT -6
Peter...
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Post by zoel on Jul 17, 2005 19:30:40 GMT -6
who was so incredibly offended that he decided to do...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jul 28, 2005 10:39:22 GMT -6
Go overboard with and and sigh!
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Post by zoel on Jul 28, 2005 13:06:54 GMT -6
This sentance being wholely incomprehensible, the editor tried to fix it, but it was written and pen and he didn't have any white-out so...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
|
Post by HCM Brain Candy on Jul 28, 2005 20:49:06 GMT -6
He took a knife and stabbed the script with it. Unfortunetly, he was still in prison so he was put into solitary confinement for a week...
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Post by zoel on Jul 30, 2005 20:12:56 GMT -6
where he promptly went mad. Fortunately, this enabled him to walk through walls thus escaping from prison but...
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
|
Post by HCM Brain Candy on Aug 6, 2005 16:38:55 GMT -6
He somehow managed to walk through the bondaries between universes and found him self in the Power Rangers universe...
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Post by zoel on Aug 6, 2005 21:39:08 GMT -6
where he was promptly attacked by a horde of poorly-animated villians
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HCM Brain Candy
High Cleve Person
Supreme Overlord of TPWLP
The problem with the universe is you.
Posts: 4,008
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Post by HCM Brain Candy on Aug 11, 2005 16:04:06 GMT -6
The editor, being a complete wimp, attempted to parry all their blows desperatly. Amazingly, all the villians' martial arts skills sucked so the editor emerged victorious...
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I AM THE IZOD!!
High Cleve Person
This is what happens when I eat too many baked beans.
Posts: 513
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Post by I AM THE IZOD!! on Aug 11, 2005 22:10:18 GMT -6
And again he walked through a universal barrier and ended up in The Wiz.
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